- What is my nationaly:
- I was born in Syria
- My hair:
- My tattoo:
But what can you do if he seems to be losing interest? Can you regain it if it seems to be slipping?
You're not a mindreader, but you're also not blind. And more….
You must first free yourself from being attached to the outcome an start being objective in how you consider each piece of information. Even if you don't want to confront the harsh truths, being as objective as you can is your key to discovering the warning s and evaluating what they mean. You're both rarely spending any time together. And when you do, it's because YOU made the plans and maybe even coerced him into participating. There are even times when you try to make plans, but he makes up some excuse or finds some reason to avoid it. He is trying to distance himself from you, making it easier to end things as time goes on.
In an ideal world, he would just come out and disclose how he truly feels, but guys will often avoid this so that they don't feel like the "bad guy".
2. he doesn’t ask you as many questions.
He thinks he's trying to avoid hurting you, but he's really just running away. You want to confirm that he's not just suddenly really busy. Ultimately, there's no better solution than to just have an honest discussion about your feelings, regardless of how long you've been seeing each other. If he actually isn't interested in spending time with you, then you should end things - you deserve way better. You feel like he has started to slack off recently when it comes to your relationship. He is rarely making any plans to hang out or take you out to nice dates.
He puts in no effort, just the bare minimum. Maybe he only replies when you text or call him and never initiates a conversation himself.
2. your partner’s moody when it comes to spending time with you
Most importantly, you've noticed changes in how he carries himself around you - he doesn't maintain his physical appearance like he used to, doesn't try to impress you or win you over anymore, etc. His behavior is a direct representation of his feelings. Part of him is no longer motivated to go out of his way for you. When we like someone and really enjoy their company, we're more enthusiastic about doing things with them.
Another part of him is probably trying to distance himself from this relationship as much as he can - to avoid pain and hurt to both of you. The best route of action would be similar to what I suggested under 1.
There's a chance this isn't actually about your relationship - that he's going through certain life events which have made him lose motivation in general. If you've known him long enough, you'll likely know if something serious is going on. In which case, you will want to support him during his time of need and hopefully, things will get back to normal soon. If not, your only approach is to open up a dialogue about this with him.
And if his explanations and justifications don't satisfy you, then it's your responsibility to move on from this relationship. His recent attitude and behavior make you think you're no longer a priority to him. He doesn't really pay attention to you and his plans never fit into your schedule.
He always seems busy when it comes to you, but has a ton of time for other people and activities. Maybe when you guys first started dating, he did everything you ever asked, which just makes it worse now that his default response is to make excuses - canceling dates at the last minute and saying you guys will do it "another day".
Focus on your own self-worth.
He has started to realize he doesn't want to be with you anymore but he also doesn't want to be the one to end things. He's afraid to end things himself because of how it will make you feel, or maybe he's just scared to even be honest about his feelings. If he has the time and motivation to hang out with other people and do other activities, yet he's avoiding you, it's pretty clear he doesn't want to be with you anymore.
It's not going to be easy, but the only solution here is to end this relationship.
2. date other men
When you guys first started dating, he'd often make distant plans with you. Maybe a vacation to some mountains, a friend's wedding, etc. But recently, he has started to make excuses for not committing to plans in the future. Maybe he is no longer sure he'll get leave for the ski trip you both were planning.
Maybe he just shuts you down any time you bring up plans about your future together. He doesn't want to commit to any plans with you because he doesn't want to commit to you.
You are here
He doesn't see a future with you, and maybe even just waiting to end things as soon as he can. He shuts down any discussion you start about vacations and trips because he knows he won't follow through with them. Here you can't be sure whether he's against committing to you or just committing in general. Maybe he doesn't want to be with you, or maybe he is just scared to be with someone, period.
He could casually make plans with you earlier when things weren't as serious between you both, but as time has gone on, he is starting to realize where things are leading to commitment and maybe that's scaring him. The best course of action here is to try and gently open him up to a discussion about commitment and what he wants from his future. Maybe he's just done with you, or maybe he's just really scared of commitment and he needs your help.
1. your partner feels distant
You'll only know for sure if you ask him. This is likely to be a guy you haven't been seeing for too long. He doesn't like to put labels on things and has never hinted at wanting anything serious. He isn't taking any steps towards making things official between the two of you, and maybe the few times you've tried to talk about it, he just makes vague excuses about friends or wanting to be sure you're right for him and vice versa.
And all this while, he continues to pursue you intimately and practically treat you like a girlfriend.
If he is acting like you guys are a couple but unwilling to actually vocalize it and make the commitment, there is a strong chance that he isn't interested in a deeper "relationship". Especially if he uses phrases like, "We have to be sure we're right for each other" regularly.
This isn't to say that he doesn't like you or that you guys have no potential future. But the chances of things getting deeper are very unlikely.
1. do nothing
While there's a small chance this guy is just really, really trying to be sure you both are right for each other; it's far more likely that he just isn't interested in anything more than a casual relationship.
Especially if he's more focused on physical intimacy than emotional. In such a situation, you should stick to your guns - if you want a proper commitment and he's always making excuses, your only solution is to bid farewell. When you first started dating, he was always decisive about what he wants to do, what his plans were, whether he wants to go out, etc.
But recently, he has become very indecisive and his responses are often vague. If you ask him what he's going to be doing later in the day, he's unsure. If you ask him whether he wants to go out, he's not sure he'll have time, etc. He rarely ever shares his plans with you, too, and then you find out he has been out with other friends.
When you ask him something, his responses are vague and maybe it feels like you're pulling teeth every time you try to get an answer out of him. Always being vague about his plans when you ask him, being unsure if he'll be able to make time for you, being unsure about what he wants to do when you ask him; and yet he can make time for his friends - all this indicates he is not looking forward to seeing you and maybe even avoiding it.
He is vague about his responses because it makes it easier for him to not commit to any plans. This is the same reason he is unsure about what to do when you ask for his opinion. He's trying to distance himself from you, and maybe even put the onus of the breakup on you so that he's not the "bad guy".
He'll likely continue to avoid any line of questioning and discussions if you confront him about his behavior. He'll probably even be offended by your assertions. There's a chance you can work things out with the assistance of a professional, but unless you guys have a long history, it's probably best to put this relationship in the rearview mirror. You guys used to text, call often and he wanted to always see you. But lately, there's been a sudden slowdown in the communication between you guys.
Maybe there's even been a couple of times when he said he'd call you the next day but then failed to do so. Maybe there's even been times when he doesn't reach out at all for days, and then suddenly wants to meet up. If he's avoiding calls and responding vaguely via texts, that's an even bigger flag that something is up.
1. you're not spending nearly as much time together as you used to.
This situation is more likely if you guys have only been dating for a short period. Men aren't very good at feigning interest and if you guys haven't been together very long, likely, he's just not very invested in you. Him still keeping up the correspondence, especially with long breaks in between, makes it likely that he doesn't want to burn bridges between you both - wants to still hook up once in a while if he can. What to do?
If you're looking for an actual committed relationship, then you can't play along with him. You have to have a proper discussion with him about what each of you wants from this relationship and future.
And if things don't align, you need to move on. Next time he responds to you after a long break just to "hang out", call him out on it.